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Betrayal

I’ve been betrayed by the ones that I thought I could trust.
I feel lost in a world that no longer feels just.
My friends are all strangers that have turned a blind eye.
“I’m here for you always” seems a meaningless lie.

I want to cry out, yell and scream please come back.
But I sit quietly alone, my heart broken and cracked.
I’m silenced by pride, and a need to look strong.
But my façade’s slowly breaking and it won’t last for long.

So I sit in my room, the music turned up too loud.
A broken shell of a women, with her head sadly bowed.
Shut down, I crawl in to the one place I’m safe.
Falling into the arms of Ed’s welcome embrace.

This pain I can handle, and it feels just like home.
In this world that I live in, the rules are my own.
In this world there is order, no twist or surprise.
No friendship betrayals or vicious goodbyes.

And in this world I must say I do truly believe
The pain that I feel really brings stress relief.
For it lives in my body and when the time comes.
It’s here when I need it, and gone when I’m done.

It never hurts me or leaves me, my most loyal of friends.
Promises always to be there, even right at the end.
Never questions my motives, as to why I came back.
No sudden betrayals or surprising attacks.

See, friends always hurt you & everyone leaves.
But in my world of ed I can soar like the breeze.
I can rocket through mountains and jump over the moon.
Oh yeah, there’s a catch, I know I’ll die soon.

For any questions, comments, concerns, or information on how YOU can get involved with diabulimia helpline email info@diabulimiahelpline.org The DBH Phoenix is a Trademark of Diabulimia Helpline. Copyright 2010, all rights reserved. Website last updated September, 2019. 
The material on this website is for informational purposes only and is not intended to constitute medical advice. Always consult your physician or other qualified health provider for diagnosis and treatment of any health related matter.